"When the Other Bows, You Bow Back"

Recently my mum and I had an argument about my behaviour. You see, I had this habit of sitting on the rice pot when I am feeling a little tired (or just plain lazy), and allow the pot to support the weight my frame (weird habit of mine no.1). So one day, I was merely squatting down scooping rice in the barrel when my mum exclaimed, “Don’t sit on the rice pot! Brings bad luck!” and my reaction was, “I don’t believe in bad luck.” XP

Okay, jokes aside though, it was not exactly a hilarious event to begin with. We had not yet gone to the level of shouting, but raised voices were heard throughout the argument. My mum scolded that it was part of our culture, and that I should show respect to all things. She gave an analogy: would I eat from a potty?

My response was based on logical reasoning. First, my action does not place much stress on the pot, as I was lighter than most people my size (and I am quite small in build), and that the pot was of quality (relatively speaking) metal, so chances are unlikely that I went past its yield strength (for more information, you can refer to books on Mechanics of Materials).

Second, in response to my mum’s analogy, how could a person who has already taken his bath, dirty the rice pot and its contents which are around 15cm away from me? Are you saying the germs somehow flow through my pants, onto the wall and into the grains? Come on! In any case, a few seconds more and the rice would be washed thoroughly and then cooked, destroying most of the remaining bacteria in the process. We should worry more of granary weevils for that matter.

Another reason I gave was that culture closes your mind to possibilities. It places a limit and obstructs you from growing. Quite an irony, seeing as I fully support (with valid reasons) the traditions of the Catholic Church – but then again, no where in the Bible do I find that you cannot sit on the cooking pot, or that this in some way is in contrary to God’s teachings.

After that event however, I took some time to reflect upon what had taken place. Being alone quietly in my room, I had come to realise it all bores down to one thing – respect.

One of the 10 Commandments God had laid for us is “Honour thy father and mother, that thou may inherit long life in the land the Lord giveth thee” (Exodus 20:12). Note, that while this is not the greatest of the Commandments which Jesus mentioned (Mark 12:29-31), this is the ONLY Commandment God mentioned which followed up with a blessing.

My mum is someone whom I dearly love. We have our rough times or disagree in certain matters occasionally, but that does not change the fact that she is my mother, and has provided me the best to her capability in many areas of my life. My mum supported whatever interest/field I chose endeavour in (although she did mention last time she does not want to visibly see my rides, else she will have a heart attack and ban me from future rides XD), and gave me a huge measure of freedom over my life. Most of the advice she gives is the advice of a mother: born of care, sound from experience, taught in patience and given with love. That said, I had no reason not to honour her orders.

When I look back, I knew what she said was true, and had a practical reasoning to it. To me, sitting on a rice pot may be a norm, but had others seen me like this, likely this would leave a negative impression and perception on them. To anyone whom is viewing this, isn’t that RIGHT? :). If you do, I cannot blame you – after all, sitting on a rice pot will look like I am shitting on the rice pot, aye?

My mum also taught me, both in words and actions, that appliances perform better if you treat them with respect and care. I myself will testify and say this: respect the sword and the sword will respect you. If you do not care for and maintain your instruments, how could you expect it to last a long time?

In comparison, I can clearly see the contrast between my dad’s and my mum’s car respectively. A Citroen BX, it was a powerful vehicle during its time, but my dad hardly (if ever) sends it for maintenance unless some part ceased functioning. My mum on the other hand, always sends her previous Nissan Sunny (now using an Iswara; the Nissan was stolen) for maintenance every 2-3 months, and was even commented she was overdoing it. The results? For my dad’s car, it occasionally suffers a breakdown, is hot and stuffy with the air con full blast, leaks frequently, uses lots of energy, jerky clutch…you get the picture. In my mum’s case, it performs better than we first bought the car. Yes, better. I kid you not.

Lastly, how can I rightly expect others to honour mine, if I do not uphold the same for others? As they say, what goes around comes around. Jesus Himself set an example in this. In Luke 2:41-51, even though He was the Son of God and told his parents, “I must be in My Father’s house”, yet he “went down with them, returning to Nazareth, was subject to them.” During His baptism in Matthew 3:13-17, He replied to an objecting John the Baptist, “Let it be like that for now that we may fulfil the right order.” (notice that only then after did the Father approved Him with signs from Heaven) And then later, Jesus mentioned during His sermon on the mount, “Do not think I have come to remove the Law and the Prophets. I have not come to remove but to fulfil them.” (Matthew 5:17) Through these (and more), Jesus proved He did not set aside traditions or protocol; in fact He shows that I am to offer my respect to all, especially my elders.

And so! After that event, I have decided cut that habit of mine concerning the rice pot. A bit of an inconvenience to me especially after a gruelling day, but the road to perfection is not made to be a breeze is it? Anyway, a good step towards building up my character in conjunction with the start of the Lenten season. God has such great timing for my resolution plans man; He knows and sets the best dates. Gotta surrender it all to Him to plan these (and all my other) events. Kudos to the Trinity!

RFG always.