Anime Allegory

Not long ago I finished watching the animation series Puella Magi Madoka Magica (yes, I enjoy Japanese anime – surprise surprise =D), after being recommended by several uni-mates. Initially I intended to keep myself from this show, not because of the ‘magical girl’ theme, but due to the series being too short – only 12 episodes.

Throughout the series, I noticed somewhat the dark and moral themes presented in the anime. The final episode somewhat moved me a bit; the words at the end had me recall that there is always someone watching over you; and I gave my verdict that it was an above average show (for the many who really enjoyed it, I apologise but it just did not appeal highly to me, not that I believe those who watched it would be reading this though XD). That was in essence my thoughts on the anime at that time.

Sometime later, as I was browsing the net in search for any manga/anime with Christian-based themes, I chanced upon this site, beneaththetangles.wordpress.com. More specifically, I came across this article, which left me quite a while in reflection. For those who are reading this, I recommend you also read what the author, TWWK eloquently wrote there.

Warning: spoiler alert for those who have not, and intend, to watch Puella Magi Madoka Magica.

To briefly summarise those thoughts,

• Madoka’s final sacrifice displays the mankind’s fallen state and the value of Jesus Christ.
• The relationship of Kyubey and the girls is similar to the serpent tempting Adam and Eve to eat the fruit in the garden of Eden, both instances the latter not realising the full consequences of their act.
• Madoka taking on the curses of all the magical girls throughout history parallels Jesus taking the burden of sin of all humankind.
• Madoka left Homura her red ribbon, reminding her she is not alone. Likewise, Christ, when He ascended to the Father, sent the Holy Spirit to the believers.
• Christ overcame sin upon the Cross. Similarly, all magical girls were freed from the curse of becoming witches due to Madoka’s self-sacrifice. Yet suffering continues in both cases. Sin is still prevalent in our world; while demons came in place of witches. But this life, after renewal is much better than the previous. The magical girls still fight, but no longer live under the witch’s curse. Christians still have to deal with sin, but can now look forward in hope towards our heavenly destination.

While the points were certainly quite eye-opening, what particularly struck me were not the insights that were presented, but the fact that I failed to notice those insights even after completing the anime some time ago (for a person who partly focuses allegory theology, I must admit I am a little disappointed with myself). From time to time I like to fancy myself drawing anime-like artwork or creating Catholic-themed manga (by the way, computer graphics design would have been my first option for tertiary education before engineering). Part of this is fuelled somewhat due to some of these Japanese productions poking fun at, and sometimes showing open contempt for Christianity. To say nothing of the fan service that comes with almost every anime, many of them promote questionable moral values, whether directly or through subtle undertones within their works. Really now, is sexual-themed humour a must for a show to be successful?

Reading TWWK’s article was in a way a wake-up call for me. Although reminded often, many a time I fail to recognise God’s presence in every aspect of my life, especially during periods of entertainment. “God is not only found in Church, Scripture or prayer.” It is easy for one to say it, even more so to take this sentence for granted. Only when you have personally experienced something meaningful (and repeatedly) does the phrase nail home. The Madoka post reaffirms me that there is indeed a divine dimension in all areas of activity.

God is truly present everywhere. We need however, to constantly remind ourselves to open our eyes and ears and tune ourselves towards His presence. Not an easy task to be sure, yet “he who seeks finds” (Luke 11:10). With this in our hearts, I hope that we will gradually come to see Him in everything we encounter, and to glorify Him through all that He has placed before us.

RFG always.

PS: by chance (or should I say, His plan) the passage which I read while writing this, Joshua 22:10-34 reminded that praise, although presented differently, is just as acceptable to glorify His name as with other forms of more traditional or contemporary praise, as long as it is absent from sinful aspects – it is more the intention that gives what we do meaning.

T-O-lo-G

I enjoy theology. I wrote it in my CV; I mention it when asked about a personal hobby/interest; I can spend hours on a single passage, topic or issue pertaining to this field; I have considered – and still considering – taking a major in this course.

Yet if there is one thing about my ‘style’ of theology, quite often my interpretations/derivations serve no practical purpose in daily life. I am currently reading a book by Haddon W. Robinson entitled Biblical Preaching, which stresses the importance of the application of Scripture to our lives here on earth. If I were to follow strictly to the book, I can safely say that my works would fail the course.

Let me take my interpretation for Numbers 19:1-10 for example (just run through it if you have not read it yet). Now, allow me to share with whoever is reading this a perspective of this passage:

1-10. Reflects and foreshadows Christ’s Passion.

2. Red heifer.             Jesus.

3. Similar to the high priests, had Jesus taken outside of Jerusalem and crucified Him in their presence.

6. Cedar wood. Brings to mind the wooden cross on which Christ was crucified. Hyssop. Recalls the reed used to bring vinegar to Jesus (John 19:29). Scarlet wool. Reminds of the scarlet robe in Matthew 27:28. Throw them onto the burning heifer. Note these 3 (analogies) were associated to Jesus during Crucifixion.

7-8. Priest. Man who burns it. Unclean. Reflects the 2 parties’ (the priests and Roman soldiers) sin for crucifying an innocent man.

9. A man who is clean…ceremonially clean place. Recalls Joseph, the upright and righteous man who buried Jesus in his own unused tomb (Luke 23:50-53). They are to be kept…from the purification of sin. The blood of Jesus was covers the heart of every believer and purifies them from sin.

7,8,10. Unclean until evening. They will remain under sin until they repent and are baptized (Acts 2:38). Wash his clothes. Bathe in water. Refers to the act in Acts 2:38.       

10. This will be a lasting ordinance…residing among them. Now the blood of Jesus is the everlasting covenant for all who believe (Luke 22:20).

Frankly from my point of view, this passage interpretation would do little to convince someone of Christ’s mercy, or that he/she needs to be baptised. The allegory hidden within the passage is too vague to be used as a conversion story, and only devoted people who enthusiastically read their Bibles would ever pause to ponder on its allegorical meaning. There are other stories contained in the Bible which would make greater impact to be used for evangelisation. Without seeing it metaphorically in light of the New Testament, one may even claim that this passage has no bearing in our lives today.

So to why do I continue to pursue this? I guess in a rational sense the closet simile I can conjure is the same as to why some people devote extensive time into literature. What is the meaning of this person’s actions? What is the author trying to convey? What is the underlying message of the whole story? And when all the pieces of the plot finally fit in, there is some sense of fulfilment left in us by the author.

Perhaps it could also be viewed similar to art. To many, a drawing serves no practical purpose other than for décor/aesthetics, yet there are some who would spend hundreds, thousands, even millions in cash for what others may judge as an ordinary piece of artwork.

As for myself, I do not read the Bible or study theology solely to find a way to live, an answer to a problem, a praise to sing, encouragement or strength in life (of course, that does NOT mean I do not read the Bible for those purposes as well). Perhaps some may feel that by doing the above it is enough to get by into the Kingdom of Heaven, or perhaps they may feel it is not their calling. To me however, I hold it a privilege that God is constantly opening my eyes and allowing me to see the hidden beauty of His Word and works, and how all of them fit His being like a jigsaw puzzle.

Until now up from the time I first realised my interest in this, it has never really disturb me that I could not apply a passage to directly fit in my life today. Had the Bible been composed solely as a book of prayers and instructions, it would have lost much of its credit during the course and change of times. Yet the Bible is rich in the person and revelation of God for those who stop and meditate on the His Word.

In university, a lecturer can have either one of these 2 relationships to a person. First, he/she can have student-teacher relationship. Those who are grouped under this category come, teach, and leave after the period is over. Their role ends upon completion of the lesson. However, we could also see our lecturer more of a friend-educator instead of the afore-mentioned. If we cultivate a deeper relationship with our lecturer, we find that the subject taught becomes easier to absorb, and he/she becomes more approachable. Furthermore he/she is more willing to assist you should you run into problems regarding your thesis or assignments, and you may even acquire additional knowledge/insight regarding the subject as well as in other matters. Similarly, I see God more under the latter category, though in an all-encompassing manner. Our relationship with Him should not be that of a person who only teaches or supports us, but also someone who we are able to spend time with as like a friend. And with a friend, every a minute detail about to him/her that we note indicates the strength in the relationship.

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God (John 1:1). To contemplate on the Bible is to contemplate on the Lord. And by contemplating with the Holy Spirit, one will steadily come to know the innermost heart of God. That is what theology is to me.

RFG always.

PS: by the way, to whoever reading this, if you enjoy theology as well give me a holler aye? =)

Growing in Silence

Every once in a while I would take a day off typical “routine” prayer and Bible reading to sit quietly in the presence of God. There were times I spent quite some time kneeling in adoration before the Blessed Sacrament back in my hometown, praying about nothing in particular, yet leaving the chapel feeling blessed with a fruitful time as was in the post.

During those moments of silence, I find that much can be revealed and gained by merely being still in His presence. Since young, I had always been taught that communication is meant to be two-way; being still is an effective mean to allow God to speak into our hearts, amidst all the prayers and praises we offer to Him.

I firmly believe a true relationship is not built upon a set of rules, a call for help or unconnected/distant head-based knowledge. Likewise, I do not believe I can truly have a genuine relationship with God merely through prayers of request and thanksgiving, or by reading the Bible and studying Scriptures. Such indeed will carry us far in our faith, yet one must move beyond asking favours and impersonal knowledge to deepen our intimacy with God.

Is a friend only one when you need aid? Are your parents only your parents by blood and house rules? Can you truly get closer to someone merely by reading about their life, expressing admiration or a word of thanks? A real close relationship is one where both parties constantly enjoy the companionship with the other, regardless of what you are doing, even if you were to just sit beside him/her in silence. Communication goes beyond spoken words.

Even as the silence allows us to be more receptive towards God’s voice, there are times when God does not appear to put a particular word in our heart; yet I believe it more than suffice to merely dwell in His Presence, even if we cannot perceive Him speaking to us. Quite often I would allow my thoughts to flow freely during these moments of silence. I ask God questions unrelated to Scripture or its application, talking to Him in my heart as I would to a friend. And often enough, it feels somehow as though I receive a reply to those candid questions, the responses simple yet deep.

There are also periods where I would lie back and contemplate all that God has done for me in life. Looking back at all the wonders and experiences He has given me reminds me of how much He has showered upon me in this life. By making a trip down this memory lane, I may even discover and gain fresh insights, which I may have missed or taken for granted during the moment itself.

Still there are times when I would take the moment just to sit back and enjoy the stillness in God’s Presence. Times where I would lay everything down and dwell fully in Him. No words used; none are needed. Just as an intimate couple in each other’s arms; a relationship past spoken words – I am sure the feeling is the similar, if not better. And I am certain this is merely a shadow of the joy which awaits us in Heaven at the end of our earthly sojourn.

In the midst of our life, it is important to take a step back to reflect in the presence of God. Try and find some time for silent contemplation within our hectic schedule. Allow yourself an opportunity to develop an intimate relationship with God, as it is the greatest relationship anyone can ever hope to have.

But I have calmed and quieted my soul,
Like a child quieted at its mother’s breast;
Like a child that is quieted is my soul.

(Psalm 131:2)

RFG always.

'Heralds'

T'was supposed have ended the day on a high note, what with all the assignments and test finished, plus the weekend to look forward to. Then I decided to open an article a previous college mate wanted share to me. How someone claimed to have gone to Hell and came back, seeing specific people, even Pope John II, in Hell. How we Catholics are "idolatrous" and saints we venerate "demons". And some other claims as well. If that was not upsetting enough, the one who forward me the link did not even bother hearing my (a Catholic) side of the story and testimonies.

So I decided to cool my head a bit with some music. At this time, this song really spoke to me, encouraging me. "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"

If I were not to try reach out to the person, what are the chances someone else would do it? The Lord Himself was sure to have felt the same pains and frustrations when explaining to the uncomprehending masses and the Jews who accused Him of "having a demon" (John 9:48).

"Who you are is all from Me." A herald I am. How we live the fight is who we are. "Who you are is all from Me." "You will suffer but my strength is enough.""Though You will suffer your strength is in Me."

Check my pulse, am I still breathing?
Will You grasp my wrist and hold it dear to Your heart?
To see if I am beating for You and only You my Father
How we live and fight is who we are
"Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"
"Who you are is all from Me"
I'm leaving behind the things of this world
"Follow me my son and let the dead bury their own"
So test me oh Lord, examine my soul
"Follow me my son for what you reap you will have sown"
Give light to my eyes to see
Your glory divine and break through these skies
Hear me when I cry to see Your grace come down and purge these dead lives
"Have I not given you a spirit of power and love?"
I will live to fight for these dead lives
"Have I not given you a spirit of power and love?"
How we live and fight is who we are
And as You dwell inside my heart your burning a fire that's growing
So when I feel the warmth subside rekindle the embers that's burning
Check my pulse, am I still breathing?
Will You grasp my wrist and hold it dear to Your heart?
To see if I am beating for YouA herald I am
"A mirror to Me"
For sin is destroyed"
You've been set free"
How we live the fight is who we are
"Who you are is all from Me"
"You will suffer but my strength is enough"
Still send me"Though You will suffer your strength is in Me"
Still send me.

Wolves at the Gate - Heralds

(Isaiah 6:8; Matthew 8:20; Psalm 126:5; Matthew 6:26; 2 Timothy 1:7)

RFG always.

Edited: 15 July 2012. Slight tweaking of language and verse additions.

Faith and Reason

Awhile back while browsing through my newsfeed on Facebook, I came across this particular picture which I find quite disconcerting. It was uploaded by one my Christian Fellowship (CF) members back during my college days.

What was even more disturbing for me is that the person who posted this is quite active in her faith, even leading a Christian committee back at her area at the time she posted the posted image.

Whenever phrases or images of this sort goes out, it always baffles me as to how such Christians, who are active in their Church and other ministries, seem to show lack of responsibility on posting messages they think is a genuine “Christian” message. They post and follow whatever moves them, but show little regard in searching deeper into the faith. Such attitude is dangerous as it is bound to mislead others, especially who are new to the faith, beginning from the person who posted it his/herself.

God made everything in the world, and that includes the ability for us to reason. Jesus knew this, and took it into consideration when He went about in His work. Else, He would not have performed miracles, He would not have revealed Himself during after the Resurrection, nor would He give any visible sign of the Holy Spirit during Pentecost. Nowhere in the Bible would you find Jesus saying that to have faith you must discard all reasoning.

To be a witness of the work, the disciples had to first witness the work. Our faith is in a way very much dependant on reason. We believe because of what God has shown and done for us in our lives. A person who has not an encounter with God will find it impossible to truly believe in Him. For one to come to terms with faith, he/she will have to first find his/her reasons to believe.

Blind trust is quite different from true faith. If I were to give an analogy, the former is more akin to a child thinking his biological parent can answer and accomplish everything under and beyond the sun. When St Paul wrote “We live by faith, not by sight” in 2 Corinthians 5:7, he certainly did not mean that we are to walk down a busy street with both our eyes closed. Likewise, such feelings are not led by the Holy Spirit, but by our own unformed conscience and an impulsive heart. A talented charismatic leader can stir up strong emotions in the masses, even if the message in question is misleading.

The laws of God do not depend on how one feels. God willed them to be knowable, even in the absence of strong emotion and apparent miracles. While the mysteries of God are unfathomable and inexhaustible, they are ultimately knowable, since God willed them to be known. If not, why would He reveal Himself in the Scriptures? Would not God be pleased to make Himself known to His children? Why would He have them grasping in the dark? Indeed Isaiah relates some gifts of the Spirit, and that includes knowledge and understanding (Isaiah 11:2).

That said, I will not deny there are times where we have to make a leap into darkness through faith; however, those times are not your everyday ordinary times. Such times are usually major decisive events – cases of emergency – but to the majority, they are not a daily occurrence.

The late Pope John Paul II phrased this meaning beautifully when he said “Faith and reason are like two wings on which the human spirit rises to the contemplation of truth; and God has placed in the human heart a desire to know the truth—in a word, to know himself—so that, by knowing and loving God, men and women may also come to the fullness of truth about themselves.” This complements what was written: “Ever since the creation of the world His invisible nature, namely, his eternal power and deity, has been clearly perceived in the things that have been made (Romans 1:20).”

If we are to discard reason not only will we be shutting out an important trait God gave us, we will also be closing our eyes to the wonders and marvels the Lord set in place in our physical world. In the words of St Peter himself:

“Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.”
(1 Peter 3:15)

RFG always.

Reference:

Hahn, Scott. (2009). Reasons to Believe. New York: Doubleday Broadway Publishing Group.

Paul II, John. (1998, September 14). Fides et Ratio. Roman Catholic Church. Retrieved May 2, 2012, from http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/encyclicals/documents/hf_jp-ii_enc_15101998_fides-et-ratio_en.html

Come and Share at the Table

Today is Holy Thursday, a day whereby Catholics celebrate the institution of the Eucharist – that is, the breaking of bread (the Body of Christ) and the sharing of wine (His Blood). Due to my having a night replacement class, I was not able to participate in Church. However, I intended to at least do something to commemorate this holy day.

And so, yesterday I bought a packet of bread that would be my dinner this night, to simulate what Jesus had done with His disciples more than 2000 years ago. I also decided before taking my evening meal (which, by the way, consists of the packet bread and some sliced potatoes/fries), to go through the readings which would be said in Mass today.

As I went through the passages, I began to doubt my simulative action – that is, having bread for dinner. The first reading, taken from Exodus 12:1-8 and 11-14, felt unrelated and distant to what I was doing. In fact, even the other 3 passages did not immediately click as I read through them one by one.

I suppose the main reason for my apprehension was that I am not, after all, celebrating Mass with the rest of the congregation. I am not consuming the bread transubstantiated into the Body of Christ (only the priest is able to perform that) nor do I feel it right imitating that act. Not that eating bread for a change is wrong; I just did not see the point in my actions then. Nevertheless, after going through the 4 passages and closing it off with prayer, I decided to make do with the food I have without topping up with additional items.

As I sat down and took my meal, I kept thinking about the readings and of the Lord’s Supper. Within the quiet and stillness of the room, I became aware that I kept dwelling on the Word and the actions of God. I felt a certain calmness, as if the Lord had specially prepared me a place in His soothing Presence. Through the simple meal without any distraction, my thoughts remain focused on the Lord. I may not have participated bodily in His Church, yet I felt as though I had somehow shared in His Life during my dinner.

My actions may not have immediately connected nor do I think I fully comprehend them still, but in the end I counted this evening a fruitful one today. To me, nothing is more precious than being under the presence of the Lord.

Dear Father,

I thank you for this time

In which You have given me

That I may spend it LordHowever little it may be, with You.

Father

Though I cannot be on this day together with Your Church

I pray O Lord that I will be able to participate

Even a little, in this celebration.

Father

Even as You Lord

In the days of the Old Testament

Set Your chosen people free

Today You have set us free in full

Through the offering of the Lamb

And now I stand here

Offering my life in thanksgiving

As I remember of the life I share

In you through the Eucharist

Together with my brothers and sisters

One body in Christ.

O Lord

Just as I share in Your body

May I come to learnTo share in Your life

To live and serve one another

Washing other’s feet as you have done

Just as You have given me this example to follow

That I draw closer towards You

Towards the Most Sacred Heart of Jesus.

All of this I pray

In Jesus name

Amen.

RFG always.

Human Reason vs Divine Faith

Once when I was in my hometown during semester break from university, my cell group leader conducted a Lectio Divina for the night’s session. The word is Latin for ‘divine reading’, and is a form of meditative and prayerful reading of Scripture. The reading was taken from Mark 1:14-20 (which according to him, was supposedly the week’s Gospel reading, although it was actually the week after XD).

As the leader led us in the reading, he called us to contemplate on the Word, to put ourselves in the characters’ shoes, and brought to attention certain words or phrases from the text. Such sessions really help in bringing me deeper into the Word of God, as certain details and realisations are brought to light during this time of quiet pondering.

As I pictured myself as one of the bystanders hearing Jesus in verse 15, it struck me how I would have thought of Him as a lunatic of those times. My rational mind, processing all the events and experiences that came and went before me, would have categorise Jesus as such when he went about preaching the Kingdom.

Let us be honest: if a person was out on the streets today claiming the title of God or shouting about rapture, chances are that we would pay little regard to the message other than label him/her insane, or something along that line. In this generation there are street performers such as David Blaine and Copperfield; it is not hard to imagine there would be some back then who were able to pull off similar feats, while taking advantage of the crowds’ ignorance to attribute themselves to some divine being.

Indeed there were false prophets and magicians in the Old as well as in the New Testament (Deuteronomy 13:1-4; Jeremiah 50:36; Ezekiel 13; Acts 5:36-37, 8:9; 2 Thessalonians 2:2; 1 John 4:1), which make it all harder in discernment. There had been other uprisings too – those which were not recorded in the Bible, or were merely given a passing mention (Acts 5:36-37; the rebellion of Simon of Peraea, and Simon bar Kokhba).

Yet in Mark 1:20, the first disciples answered His call and followed Jesus, braving the uncharted waters and leaving behind everything of the life they hold secure. They too had their reasons however. Luke filled in the events that happened at the lake in chapter 5:4-11, whereby they witnessed a sudden haul of fish after working all night and returning empty handed. This surely was no mere happy coincidence; being fishermen, they undoubtedly would have had the experience of their trade: the methods, behaviour, seasons and whatnot. It was then that Simon (before being called Peter) became aware of Jesus’ divinity, even if he had not fully understood it yet.

Throughout His time here on earth, Jesus continued to reaffirm His disciples through the signs and the miracles He performed. But unlike the impostors before and after Him, Jesus did not simply devote Himself to supernatural feats to garner attention (in fact, there are times when He would order those around Him to tell no one, eg: Matthew 8:2, 17:9). He taught by words and actions, and associated Himself with both classes of society. But perhaps something oft overlooked, but no less important, was that Jesus gave His disciples the same authority to drive out demons and to heal the sick, even before the Resurrection. The disciples accomplished them, not through any elaborate or secret techniques, but simply by calling upon His name (Luke 10:17).

Looking back, I am actually really blessed. Skipping over the basics I often take for granted – food, lodging, family, etc. – other events have worked out well, vividly the ones which I went in faith: finding parking lots, freeriding, my grades, my application for the university…The signs and promptings were always there, yet my mind constantly seeks to find the logic in line with the physical reality. Just as the disciples were, in fear and doubt after the Crucifixion, before Jesus revealed Himself in His Resurrected body. Just as Thomas was, refusing to believe, “unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were” (John 20:25). Adrian was quite right when he mentioned my similarity with the Apostle.

Such revelations and insights are the reason I enjoy, cherish and advocate Lectio Divina. This session reminded me to live my lifesong:

“I trust in You for life to live.”

- August Burns Red, Redemption .

RFG always.

A Single Drop Sends Ripples Throughout the Water

I am not one who talks much. Spontaneous conversation is not one of my traits, and I have never given much thought to practice such skills. Usually quiet, I am content just sitting back listening while those around me chatter away, preferring to watch the events unfold around me and enjoying the spectacle.

Even during my riding days, I would often seek secluded areas in which I could wheel around without drawing the eyes of onlookers. I guess it is partly reflected in my choice of endeavour: more towards balancing and skills that get you to one place faster (North Shore, freeride, and practical street trials) than big air and attention-grabbing manoeuvres (BMX, dirt jump).

Back in school, I was not someone who particularly stood out. I did not really participate in conventional sports, my overall grades were mediocre, and, due to my introverted personality, rarely make my voice heard among the group I hanged out with.

Yet, even with my more reclusive inclination, I somehow seem to make an imprint deep enough for quite a few people to remember me by, and the image I left on most of them are not ‘quiet’, ‘shy’ or the like. Few events occurred which spurred me to take the certain actions, and I became known by some interesting, yet complimentary titles. Some of my displays even influenced others to imitate them; my rides had others putting their feet to the pedal, and the last I heard, one of them was ultimately sponsored and taking part in downhill races.

I did not truly appreciate it then, but some of the things I did made quite an impact on others. A number of them were simple actions merely offered on a whim, but had people responding to me in unexpectedly pleasant ways.

Once during secondary school my Christian Fellowship (CF) advisor (who also happened to be my class teacher) suggested taking the period of recess to fast and pray during the period of Lent, recalling what Jesus Himself had done in the desert for 40 days. For me, who rarely ate in school on normal days, I readily took up my teacher’s suggestion and sought a quiet area in my school on the first day of Lent.

The next few weeks found me praying alone in one of the few huts sprawled within the area, albeit with a few prefects patrolling around the school. This continued until the middle of Lent, before some of my CF members spotted me in of the huts. I think I might have guilt-rode them that day XD: when I was done and heading back to class, I saw them a slight distance away from my position in a circle with their heads bowed. It did not help that one of the prefects (who happened to be a good acquaintance of mine) informed(?) them to what I was doing (right after making me laugh as well -.-, though he did not know initially what I was there for). After that incident, other students joined in as well, and the prayer group continued until the end of the Lenten season.

During my college days I was one, if not the most quiet and reclusive member in my CF. Due to consistently attending the meetings, I was chosen as part of the committee then. One day, while talking to the president and teacher-in-charge, I suggested having a retreat with the past, present and potential committee members in order to deepen our relationship with one another in God. I would not say the trip smooth sailing: for one thing, I had to organise it almost entirely by myself. Nor was it perfect, as I felt objective did not quite hit the mark. Nevertheless, the retreat seemed to have left an impression on those present, as the trend continued after I left college.

When I first joined the Catholic Students Society (CSS) at the start of university, I experienced what could be termed as a culture shock in the meetings. Members were composed almost entirely of Sabah East Malaysians, and the way they run their programmes were quite unlike their Peninsular counterparts. Worship songs were in Malay and made up most of a session, sharings were really short sometimes in Malay, and there were even times when the reference of God and the Bible were completely left out of context during sharing. If I were to describe it plainly, it was a culture exclusive group, with little leeway for anyone outside of East Malaysia to blend in (note that foreign students also make up a significant amount in the university).

Due to the stark contrast in culture, as well as my silent and not-so-flexible nature, I had difficulty participating in the sessions. Nevertheless, I continued to attend all of the meetings, and this led to an invitation to attend the Penang Coordinating Council (PCC), a meeting together with other CSSs and the priest in charge that discusses the issues pertaining to the welfare of the CSSs north of Peninsular Malaysia.

It was during the meeting I bluntly voiced out my thoughts about the CSS: the issues and the discomfort I felt every time I went for the meeting. The initial reactions I got from my own CSS leaders were expectedly a little defensive, and there was a certain pressure on my part as I was one of only 2 who are not from East Malaysia. However, after coming back from the meeting, I could see changes taking place within the community, slowly but definitively. My relationships with those who were initially taken aback from my opinion somehow also became stronger.

These experiences I have been through led me to believe that a single soul, however unassuming the person is, can truly make all the difference in the world, if he/she decides to lay a hand in the matter. There is no need to announce your views on a pulpit, but never be ashamed to stand up for your beliefs and for what is right. The light you carry will naturally find its way to others, just as one who spots a house of warmth and comfort on a dark and stormy night, and draws near for a closer look.

RFG always.