Persist in Prayer 2

Awhile back I wrote on how one should always persevere in prayer, even under trying circumstances. The post was actually a slight deviation from what I originally intended to put out, influenced by the events I went through that time.  

For this entry, I would like to emphasise again the need to persevere in prayer, but on a slightly different ground. That is, pray even if you do not have the feeling to pray. Entreat the Lord even if you do not see the significance in it. And, by extension, worship Him with the traditions handed down by the Church, even if you do not fully comprehend or commit to it.

We can all learn a thing or two from 1 Samuel 3:1-10. Merely a boy at that time, I highly doubt he could fully grasp the significance of his duties in the temple. Even more so, when the Word of the Lord first came to him, he did not immediately recognize it. Yet though he did not know nor comprehend what was happening, he persisted in answering and was ultimately chosen by the Lord.

I think it is imperative to know that the Lord oft chooses those who do not understand, and commissions those who do not fully comprehend. The desire to see the mystery and wisdom they glimpsed drove the Wise men to seek the Babe in the stable. The simpleness and lack of understanding of the shepherds and the Apostles allowed the angels and later the Holy Spirit to illuminate their path and fill that void within them. The fact is that, only when we empty ourselves can the Holy Spirit fill us with His wisdom. It was because the Scribes and Pharisees’ arrogance of their wisdom and understanding of Scripture that blinded them to the Word Incarnate, and prevented the Holy Spirit from entering their hearts.

A common example is that children may not understand what their parents are doing, but that does not mean the latter’s actions have no meaning on the children’s future, welfare or lives. When I was young, I could not understand why my mum would prioritise holding onto a lost child at the same spot until his mother arrived, over my intention to quickly return home and watch Dragon Ball. Nor did I grasp the significance when she told me not to stare directly at the sun as it would spoil my eyes. Similarly, the Apostles, disciples and crowds did not grasp (initially) the meaning of Christ’s coming and healing works and miracles, yet to those who were destined to be saved, it made a great impact in their lives.

How Isaac must have felt when he laid upon the altar, about to be sacrificed by his own father. Yet from there sprouted God’s promise of descendants as many “as the stars of heaven and as the sand which is on the seashore”. How Joseph must lamented his misery when his brothers chucked him in the well, especially given his dreams that he would be standing above them. Yet God raised him to a high position in Pharaoh’s court. How Naaman must have snorted when he was told to bathe in the river 7 times. Yet he did so, and was healed. How Peter balked when Christ told him He has to suffer on the Cross. Yet he would come to fully appreciate it on the day of the Apostle's own death. How we ourselves would initially have, and still may continue to feel when Jesus said we are to love Him more than our parents, and to give up everything in order to enter Heaven, what more saying that to small children. Yet, we know it is the Lord that blessed us with all these.

Why should we lay hands when commissioning? Why should we go for confession? Why partake in the Eucharist every Sunday? Why abstain from meat on Fridays? Why make the sign of the Cross before prayer? Why pray to Mary and the Saints? Why pray for the souls of the dead? Why, why, why…

I am not advocating to simply swallow and repeat everything as it is. It is always meaningful to know the significance of the things we believe and the actions we perform. Yet at times the answers given may not wholly satisfy us. Even if it is logically sound, our heart may not necessarily accept what we hear. A rational answer may sometimes be overwritten by rousing speeches – much politics sadly work that way. And never forget that faith transcends human rationale.

Besides, trying to find the answers to all the mysteries of the God and His works is akin to attempting to uncover all the secrets of the universe. We need not even look that far. In the highly objective and factual field of Science and Engineering, after years of research and application, we still cannot pinpoint all the parameters that affect the motion responses of an object, thus we assign a value that represents it, such as the coefficients of friction, drag and inertia. And just as we finally thought we could wrap up all there is to know, along comes another factor which opens up a new branch to many other questions. Continuing from the example of motion responses, I am referring to the relatively recent studies on vortex induced vibrations (VIV). But I digress. The point is, if we cannot completely grasp the knowledge of physical nature, how much more impossible it is then, to fully unearth the mysteries of God.

This struggle is not uncommon. Legend has it that Saint Augustine, while contemplating on the mystery of the Holy Trinity along the seashore, met a young boy filling a seashell with seawater and emptying into a hole in the sand. As the boy continued this routine, the bishop asked, “Son, what are you doing?” to which the former replied, “I am emptying the sea into this hole.” Naturally one cannot fault the bishop for exclaiming, “That is impossible!” But upon hearing that, the boy merely replied, “I will sooner empty the sea into this hole than you will be able to grasp the mystery of the Holy Trinity.”

(St Augustine, by Władysław Wankie)

Saint Thomas Aquinas was another theologian of great intellect whose writings greatly influenced the formation of the Catholic Church today. Near the end of his life he underwent a mystical experience and immediately ceased his writings. His associate Reginald recorded him saying, “…all that I have written seems like straw to me.” These men were prominent teachers blessed with great wisdom, who spent much of their life in earnest study on the Word of God. Yet they barely managed to scrape the tip of the iceberg.

So will we truly come to understand everything we do when it comes to our faith? For myself, the point of life is not to reach the end, but the journey to reach the end. Similarly, I may never be able to fully grasp the significance in my lifetime; even so, I can grow to appreciate more and more as I continue to observe and ponder upon it. Just as humans will never ever be able to comprehend the depths of God’s love, but the faithful undertake the journey anyhow, that they may catch a glimpse of it in this life, and one day come to bask in its fullness.

 “And He said, ‘The kingdom of God is as if a man should scatter seed upon the ground, and should sleep and rise night and day, and the seed should sprout and grow, he does not know how. The earth produces of itself, first the blade, then the ear then the full grain of the ear. But when the grain is ripe, at once he puts in the sickle, because harvest has come.’”

(Mark 4:26-29)

RFG always.